Thursday, May 12, 2005

Breakin' Up Is Hard To Do

My crush on Miss Garner is officially over. I will hereby no longer refer to her as "my girlfriend", I will change my screensaver on the iMac, I will breeze past magazines with her on the cover, and I'm even starting to slack on my "Alias" love because I know the Affliction's seed will surely ruin next season for me.

Now, don't get me wrong. I understand the world. I'm sure she's a lovely girl. I'm sure she's just a lady lookin' for love. Heck, at one time, we all were. But there's a choice one makes. One dates "the wrong type" because they're fun and crazy and probably a bit off-kilter, mentally, or maybe they're brooding and manic and your "new project", but one doesn't marry those people, let alone procreate with them. That's just not how you do it. Even the bores on that "Sex and the City" show would approve of my advice. Enjoy them while it lasts, then find yourself a nice, stable boy to settle down with. (Not someone that deals with mucking out stalls, mind, unless he's also the owner of said stalls.) Miss Garner happily glossed over those rules, blocked out the horror that was Bennifer, ignored the rehab and the gambling and the lap dances and the drugs, and went straight into utter gaga (which means utter gag over here). And yes, you can't help who you fall in love with, but at least you can put yourself out of harm's way when you're falling.

So, although I'm sorely disappointed, and I admit, a twinge heartbroken, I still wish her a happy life, the ridiculously adorable thing. But, I'm just not going to be that interested in it anymore.

3 comments:

Bill said...

The show has really fallen of anyway. Did you notice this season how they tried to shift the format of Alias to that of Law and Order or NYPD Blue? That is each episode at the start of the season was self-contained with little long term plot. This was an attempt to make the show syndicatable. Now they have shifted back to stories with more multi-episode arcs and plotlines, i.e Rimbaldi, crazy Aunts etc.

On the knocked up side of things...the main problem is that she can't leave her co-stars alone. She divorced the Felicity guy to be with the Alias guy who she left to be with the Electra guy.

-Chilly
A disapointed Alias fan.

happydog said...

not to mention that BEN AFFLECK IS REALLY REALLY GAY and that this is only his way of avoiding his soulmate Matt Damon.

Welcome to the blogworld, btw, it's lovely to see you.

Michael Dietsch said...

With the release of Monster-in-law, I maintain that Affleck and Vartan are wife-swapping.